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My husband and I have been married for two years. We have a relatively healthy sex life, but he will not return with oral sex.When face to face, he said he had no problem with it, He just felt it no need.I feel rejected and The main point is that he achieves orgasm, not my enjoyment. How can I talk to him without him guarding?I have never had an orgasm through penetrative sex, and in the past Relationship, I like to accept oral sex.
Your husband needs to be educated about your exact needs and the general nature of female sexual arousal and orgasm. So far, you seem to have been very patient and helpful, so it’s no wonder he thinks there is no reason to change his style. And he may be afraid that he doesn’t know what to do, so you have to help him by telling him in a very specific way that he feels good. Try to express your request for verbal pleasing in a very attractive and interesting way-so he will realize that his efforts will be rewarded. Once he knows that your arousal is a good change for him, he will be more motivated to complete the task.
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If you want to get advice on sexual issues from Pamela, please send us a brief description of your issue private.lives@theguardian.com (Please do not send attachments). Every week, Pamela will choose a question to answer, which will be posted online. She regretted that she could not communicate privately.Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions: please see gu.com/letters-terms.
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