When to reply to social media-when not to reply

I have a When it comes to social media fires, my principle is: Don’t let others become angry.

This rule saved my ass many times. For example, in a social media event, a writer responded to an article I wrote, saying that she wanted to discuss our objections in a Facebook forum of thousands of people. The wording and tone of her comment indicated that she was not interested in real dialogue, so I did not respond. If I agree to the request or make a mean comment such as “publish my own damn article”, I will always follow her script to get my attention and ruin me and my work. Should I do something else? I think I will check with the experts.

Michele Borba, an educational psychologist and author of Science magazine, said: “You do the right thing by not responding.” Prosperous person. “No response is a good response, usually the most powerful response. This person wants attention, and you don’t give them attention. She obviously wants to use and destroy you by hijacking your platform. If you humiliate her, You will lose your credibility and you can defend yourself.”

Summer Sinduja, Cyberbullying Research Center Agree and say: “Whenever we respond to someone who tries to insult us, we show our deep concern for their opinions. Then we give them the power to invalidate us.”

Not responding on social media may be the best way to show power, rather than flooding your voice and energy with noise. In fact, Research published in the journal Psychological Science Indicates that activating the keyboard is not as effective as having a one-on-one conversation with someone or sharing visual effects. Of course, if you have a real relationship with people or care about what others think of you, that would be the best choice. Ulash Dunlap, a therapist in San Francisco, said: “If someone is really not in your life, then what you are doing is right.” “If this is an important relationship, I suggest you give The person makes a call and asks to make a call to avoid miscommunication.”

Dunlap also recommends that you take five minutes and evaluate the situation before responding, and avoid over-reactions on social media so that people cannot see that they have pressed your button. “If someone belittles you or lets you bully you because of your beliefs, or tries to make yourself right or wrong, or Looking for fame Go through you and end the conversation, either without answering or saying “Thank you for your feedback”, similar to the company’s response when it is criticized. ”

So, when these situations arise, how can we prevent ourselves from losing power? “Remember, if they don’t know you well, then the people on the other end will not understand you or your life experience. They have no background story.” Dunlap said. This may also be someone who likes to win. “You can browse the person’s Facebook or Twitter feed, and you will see it. If that’s the case, find an exit strategy and end the conversation.”

“Ask yourself, does this help or hurt?” Borba said. If it helps, you can figure out how to deal with it, but if it hurts, you can ignore it. “But what if a relationship is important to you and you decide to communicate with that person? What is the best way to move forward?

“It all depends on how you speak,” Borba suggested. “Shame is not a game. What you are looking for is words of respect. There is more than one way to see things, and all aspects are important. You don’t have to agree, as long as you are polite and don’t deny the person. It’s just right. They said, “This is a way of thinking. “”