Will we never be able to pay my husband’s friend’s student loan?

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Dear Petunia,

About two years ago, my spouse agreed to help one of his best friends financially. My best friend convinced my spouse to take over his student loan. This friend promised to repay my spouse’s debt every month.

The debt is in the form of a bank draft. Every month, the payment will be deducted from our account. Unfortunately, this friend was a few months late and seemed to have no intention of paying. Any suggestions for errors in the promise?

-C.

Dear C.,

Unfortunately, when your husband takes over the loan from his best friend, he is legally responsible for the debt. This means he has to pay. If your husband fails to do so, he will ruin his credit score and may even be sued.

My advice depends on two factors: First, is the relationship between your husband and his best friend okay? Second, are his friends trying to make ends meet? Or do you think his friend is capable of repaying you but chooses not to repay?

If they still maintain a good relationship, your husband can try some guilt. He can say that the money is tight because he is repaying his friend’s loan and asked him when the payment can be resumed. Your husband can offer to accept a lower repayment amount and extend the loan to a longer repayment period. If his friend agrees, it means that you will continue to withdraw some money from your pocket every month. But in this case, it’s better to get than nothing.

If he still hasn’t gotten anywhere-or if they haven’t spoken anymore-it’s time to raise the bet. I’m not sure if this friend promised to repay the loan in writing or your husband keeps his promise. Ideally, your husband will ask his friend to sign a promissory note so that you have a legally binding document.

In any case, your husband can exert some pressure. He can use sites like RocketLawyer or UpCounsel to find free templates for request forms. He should write a letter, and if his friend fails to resume payment as agreed before a certain date, he will be forced to take him to court. He should send it by registered mail.

Of course, sending a demand letter does not necessarily mean that your husband must sue his best friend. But sometimes people do not give back to friends and family because they think there are no consequences. Your husband may remind his friends of the possible consequences he may face, thus attracting his attention.

Even if your husband does not sign the promissory note, it may be worth discussing with a lawyer whether he can choose to sue his friend. If your husband receives a text message or email from his friend agreeing to repay him, maybe he can use these as evidence of his choice to sue. Of course, suing his best friend will end the friendship. But of course I don’t want to be friends with someone who abuses this kind of generosity.

The other question here is whether it is worth prosecuting. You won’t say how much money is involved or what the financial situation of your husband’s best friend is. If you know that he is penniless, it may be meaningless to make a judgment. Remember the old saying about trying to squeeze blood from a turnip?

You and your husband may eventually have to bear the price of a mistake in this promise. However, you can definitely learn some lessons from it.

I assume that your husband agrees to take a loan in his name because he is eligible for a lower interest rate. This seems to be an easy way to help a friend, because your husband obviously trusts him to pay.But in this case, you never want your name to appear on the loan, either as the main borrower or Co-sign. I prefer to give cash to help people who pay high interest rates.

Another important lesson is that whenever you sign a loan to help a friend or family member, you should expect to be able to make these payments. This may be difficult for some people to accept. you Know that you will never break your promise to give back to someone you care about, but you can’t assume that the other person has the same values ​​as you.

No matter how you and your husband treat this friend, both of you need to reach an agreement. None of you will be legally liable for the debts of others. If you want to help your friends in the future, please only use cash that you can afford.

Robin Hartill is Penny Hoarder’s certified financial planner and senior writer.Send your tough money questions to Or chat with her Penny Hoarders Community.


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