My Boyfriend’s Parents Spend Recklessly, But He Still Sends Money

Dear Penny,

Both me and my boyfriend are college students abroad. We both earned scholarships. We make good money doing freelancing jobs online. He saves his for graduate school. I save mine for traveling.

My family is better off than his financially. Mine wants to pay for my grad school, and they are willing to help me whenever I am in need. But his family is really struggling financially.

Neither of his parents are working much right now. His father is doing small jobs barely bringing in anything. His mother is a tailor, but she only makes enough to put food on the table, and sometimes not even that.

For two years, my boyfriend has given them money constantly every month. He pays for their rent and also gives them a little allowance. He thought that his parents’ situation is only temporary, but I don’t think so.

We’re planning to get married after college. He doesn’t have anyone to help him financially so he has to work and save for our wedding. I suggested that we split the expense, but he said he wants to pay for it fully. (In our country’s culture, the man pays for the wedding and the woman for the engagement party.)

His future is not secured at all, but his parents continue to ask him for money. He has asked them to find decent jobs. He has even given them money to start a small business. But when they have money, they spend it extravagantly ( like by having family members stay in their house for months and paying for everything).

When they don’t have money, they beg my boyfriend for money. He has talked to them about managing their money, but they don’t seem to listen.

A few months ago, my boyfriend gave them everything he earned for a month for them to start their own business. He also told them this was the last time he would give them money. They accepted.

But they haven’t paid rent since then, and they want my boyfriend to pay it for them. Otherwise, the landlord will kick them out.

My boyfriend doesn’t know what to…

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