Dear Penny: Should I Say No to My Daughter-in-Law’s Shameless Plea for Cash?


Dear Penny,

My son and daughter-in-law got married in a courthouse and then later went to some island to have a wedding ceremony just for them. After they got home, my new daughter-in-law set up a reception where the bride got 25 people and the groom got 25 people to attend. So a lot of my son’s relatives did not get invited.

A few months later, my daughter-in-law calls me for the addresses of my son’s relatives to send them wedding announcements hoping to get money from them, even though they were never invited to the wedding reception. I told her it was not right for her to do that. What are your thoughts?

Oh and one more thing: Initially, my husband and I were invited to witness their marriage at the courthouse, but since the bride’s mother got sick and was unable to attend, our daughter-in-law asked us not to attend either. I was very hurt.


Dear S.,

This isn’t about wedding announcements and money, is it? The hurt you feel is completely understandable. You wanted to share in the joy of your son’s wedding. You were shut out at the last minute, but now your son and his bride want your help in shouting their joy to the world via wedding announcements.

I’m curious about whether your daughter-in-law actually said she wanted to send out wedding announcements in hopes of getting money out of relatives. Or are you inferring that if she’s sending out wedding announcements, it must be a blatant money grab?

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