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My mother is 47 and has been increasingly paranoid about her death. She’s not sickly or in bad shape. She’s been getting better about managing her sudden diagnosis of diabetes.
I think she’s doing well for her age. She works a full-time job and has little to no complaints. Personally, I think she’s just paranoid, but she’s been asking me serious questions about life insurance policies for herself. She wants me to buy a policy on her, but I’m not keen on purchasing a life insurance policy on my living mother whose death I’m not looking forward to.
Nonetheless, she continues to ask me questions about her finances and what I (her 28-year-old daughter) think she should do about her bad credit, old debt from decades ago, and a past repossession. She asks me if her policies will go to that debt? Will her 401(k) go toward those debts? Or will it be safe for my sister and me?
From what I know, she has purchased two life insurance policies and has listed me as her 401(k) beneficiary. I don’t know what I would do if she passed away suddenly, as I have a very small family that consists of just my sister and mother. (Her ex-husband/my father is estranged). I thought her accounts, 401(k), life insurance policies and debts would go into probate after she dies.
She has many years ahead of her. I feel as though she is worried about debt collectors going after money she intends to leave my sister and me when she passes. What could she do to avoid that? What is good advice for her at someone her age? I want her to live a good life now with her grandchildren and not be so worried about the future when she’s gone.
-Concerned Daughter
Dear Concerned,
It’s normal that your mom is feeling more aware of her own mortality after a sudden diagnosis. It’s also normal that you, her loving daughter, don’t want to contemplate life without your mom.
Maybe your mom is going a bit overboard. Or perhaps it just appears that way to…
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